THE OBSERVING SELF
The first short course I attended, Meeting Needs, I chose when I was handed the A4 sheet at the first year residential week. As soon as I read through I sensed that, even though I was not sure what it actually was, it would be of help to me. Particularly in the context of caring for my nephew.
I was also drawn by the paragraph:
'We will explore, through story, metaphor and fun, interactive exercises, how our awareness can be raised and old perceptions challenged to help ourselves and others to get their needs met in very practical ways.'
The course did exactly that. It was a simple practical introduction to Human Givens Therapy.
“At its core is a highly empowering idea – that human beings, like all organic beings, come into this world with a set of needs. If those needs are met appropriately, it is not possible to be mentally ill. Perhaps no more powerful a statement could ever be made about the human condition: If human beings' needs are met, they won't get depressed; they cannot have psychosis; they cannot have manic depression; they cannot be in the grip of addictions. It is just not possible.”
The two facilitators were experienced, knowledgeable, open, supportive, enthusiastic and made the whole weekend funny, profound, clear and inspiring. We started with a very simple statement:
'Living things need to take nourishment from their environment in order to survive. And to flourish'
We spent the weekend exploring what our emotional needs were in the context of the Human Givens method. How to identify them, how to get them met, how to attain a balance and how repeated destructive patterns of behaviour can be stopped. We also looked at our resources and gifts. Both those we are born with and those we develop throughout our lifetime.
'The meaning of life is to find you gift.
The work of life is to develop it
The purpose of life is to give it away'
It was a joy. Full of laughter and open sharing. And yes it was challenging in that I had to look at myself – warts and all. However, it also gave me more insight into how my nephew is and where his needs are not being and have probably never been met.
Allowing me to feel more compassionate towards him.
And it was all so simple. With useful tools to help oneself and others to become more aware of emotional needs. And the stress, fear and angst that having these unmet or out of balance causes.
Throughout the weekend there were readings from various books, not least from Quaker Faith and Practice.
Quaker faith and Practice 12.01(part)
All of us in the meeting have needs. Sometimes the need will be for patient understanding, sometimes for practical help, sometimes for challenge and encouragement; but we cannot be aware of each other’s needs unless we know each other.......... Every conversation with another Friend, every business meeting, every discussion group, and every meeting for worship can increase our loving and caring and our knowledge of each other.............. We all have our needs. Careful listening is fundamental to helping each other; it goes beyond finding out about needs and becomes part of meeting them. Some would say that it is the single most useful thing that we can do.
I was also drawn by the paragraph:
'We will explore, through story, metaphor and fun, interactive exercises, how our awareness can be raised and old perceptions challenged to help ourselves and others to get their needs met in very practical ways.'
The course did exactly that. It was a simple practical introduction to Human Givens Therapy.
“At its core is a highly empowering idea – that human beings, like all organic beings, come into this world with a set of needs. If those needs are met appropriately, it is not possible to be mentally ill. Perhaps no more powerful a statement could ever be made about the human condition: If human beings' needs are met, they won't get depressed; they cannot have psychosis; they cannot have manic depression; they cannot be in the grip of addictions. It is just not possible.”
The two facilitators were experienced, knowledgeable, open, supportive, enthusiastic and made the whole weekend funny, profound, clear and inspiring. We started with a very simple statement:
'Living things need to take nourishment from their environment in order to survive. And to flourish'
We spent the weekend exploring what our emotional needs were in the context of the Human Givens method. How to identify them, how to get them met, how to attain a balance and how repeated destructive patterns of behaviour can be stopped. We also looked at our resources and gifts. Both those we are born with and those we develop throughout our lifetime.
'The meaning of life is to find you gift.
The work of life is to develop it
The purpose of life is to give it away'
It was a joy. Full of laughter and open sharing. And yes it was challenging in that I had to look at myself – warts and all. However, it also gave me more insight into how my nephew is and where his needs are not being and have probably never been met.
Allowing me to feel more compassionate towards him.
And it was all so simple. With useful tools to help oneself and others to become more aware of emotional needs. And the stress, fear and angst that having these unmet or out of balance causes.
Throughout the weekend there were readings from various books, not least from Quaker Faith and Practice.
Quaker faith and Practice 12.01(part)
All of us in the meeting have needs. Sometimes the need will be for patient understanding, sometimes for practical help, sometimes for challenge and encouragement; but we cannot be aware of each other’s needs unless we know each other.......... Every conversation with another Friend, every business meeting, every discussion group, and every meeting for worship can increase our loving and caring and our knowledge of each other.............. We all have our needs. Careful listening is fundamental to helping each other; it goes beyond finding out about needs and becomes part of meeting them. Some would say that it is the single most useful thing that we can do.
I was drawn to explore again the concept of the Observing Self.
Mentioned in many different traditions and religions the experience of it always confirms my belief that there really must be some truth in a something that is intangible.
Call it faith.
Call it intuition.
Call it stepping back, seeing the bigger picture, awareness, mindfulness, connecting with God, love, light – not a definitive list.
For me the conundrum comes when one becomes aware of the Observing Self and then the question and exploration arises as to what/who is observing that self! And so taking those steps back has, in rare and precious moments, for me, lead to nothingness.
My experience of a place of great expansion and unknowingness that is also total acceptance.
No questions, no sense of other, no sense of self.
Often at one with the whole of creation.
Maybe this is the connection to the divine?
Enlightenment - whatever that may mean.
Perhaps it is even those two Blank Pages I wrote of.
But it always makes me laugh.